Mother and Son (Part 2)

Time: 3pm                                                                                            Weather: cloudy…

Guess is my second time to use English as a medium for blog post and coincidence is both referred to same thing (can link this for the previous post mother and son ). Actually what arouse me to write this post? Really no idea, just suddenly flash back some moment… which I never disclose to anyone…

Am I kind of cruel especially when handling with family thingy? I don’t know what will your answer, don’t even want to predict, hopefully after read this, u might understand me. My mum has problem with her backbone two month ago, and she went to small operation …

But no worry and luckily she managed to overcome all this, my mum kind of iron women style sometimes she really makes me saluted… what I want to share is the moment she recover and takes several month to rest in home. 

was a fascinating the moment when meet u again ^^

First time crying after such a longer period, and luckily I wasn’t cry in front of her, I forced myself until last minute… I still remember the whole conversation, fresh and hard to removal from memory… that day she sitting, and I was next to her, first time I sit so close with her…She smile at me, and the smiling so familiar and looks real, melted my heart, take away all my vengeance and angry… she is the other one who smiling that I describe very pretty (honestly)…

How come I never realized this? Is she always smiling at me these few years? She initiates the conversation actually but the important part is when the turn I was asking question… I told her that I actually very angry especially her actions before, hurting me always and treat me so bad (I guess my body being heat up), surprisingly her response so steady and keep smiling to me, she answered me with tone that I ever heard before. She answered mine questions that bear deeper in heart for this few years, each question with the answer that I can’t even against...

Why when I was children, I had been teaching to bear the responsibility? Why when I was excelling, I won’t get the praise but brother does? Why I’m always getting scold just a small thingy? There is lots of ‘why’ I asked… and she summarized with simple question, did u think before ‘why now u can so discipline & independence compare some people’? Why u able cares to others and handles responsibility? Did u see me scold or giving advice to neighbor son or daughter? And why I give u the strict family education always? This is just because YOU ARE MY SON…

Am I too following my intuition instead of mind these few years??Or I’m so stubborn until ignore people’s opinion? I have to thanks several people here, u rescue me from dark, I grab the sunlight eventually… the effort by effort that u all pour on someone who is solid like rock finally saw the results…admittedly, though just a slight changes but I guess this enough for making u trust that I able to recuperate or compensate what I been done so far especially the ignorance to family especially mum… and the crying parts I guess no need to elaborate much here, this is not the aims for this post..

Do I love my mum?? I don’t know how to answer for this moment … but I was so scared when I getting the news she in painful … what I gain throughout the conversation is A SON THAT BEING OVER LOVE WONT BE GROWTH…被宠的小孩是会依赖的